The way time gets sucked....

In my house, on the VERY rare occasion we are actually going away somewhere, the following invariably happens. I've procrastinated to the point that I have a TON to cram in the next 4 hours, and it all plays out something like this (true story, although names have been changed to protect the innocent-HA!).

First, I sit down to feed the baby before I really start hitting it hard. He's sitting there eating, making ridiculous gaseous explosions, then I feel something warm and see the telltale huge grin. I pick him up, and see the lovely deposit he's left on the jeans I was going to wear in the car. Much changing of mommy and baby entails, my size has changed considerably from before I got pregnant, so almost all of my pants are too big (WOOHOO!), so I tried on 4 pairs before finding something that looks decent.

Second, I finish packing our suitcase and close the top. The phone rings so I grab the suitcase and start walking towards the front of the house. Smack myself in the head when said suitcase falls open and unpacks itself in 10 seconds flat. Go answer the phone.

Mom: Hey, are you packing?
Me: yes, and I have alot to do what do ya need?
Mom: Just wanted to say hi
Me: OK, hi...click

Walk back to the bedroom, repack the suitcase, zip it up this time, and deposit it by the front door. Phone rings again.

Mom: Did you get your bag made to take with you?
Me: No unfortunately my request to god for 10 more hours in the day was denied.
Mom: Want mine?
Me: No, I have tote bags it's cool
Mom:But mine are cute
Me: Then please, name them spanky and take them out for a drink, gotta go. Love ya!

Give the baby his pacifier and sprinkle him with goofy talk and kisses. Phone rings again.

Mom: When was ex-DH coming home again?
Me: When hell freezes over I think.

Get the 3 yr old some lunch and a drink, grab the diaper bag to start packing it up. Phone rings again (have you guessed?)

Mom: Do you care if we take the kids to the state park this weekend?
Me: As long as you leave them there

Try and remember what I was doing. Phone rings again.

Mom: What time does Bobby get off work?
Me: Half past a monkey's..nevermind, Mom..later, we'll be there about 4 and I really have a
lot to do so can I PLEASE talk to you then?
Mom: Sorry I just wanted to chat with you for awhile.
Me: Tip-create a login account and find a chat room, I'm busy!
Mom: Oh ok, ya are you packed?

(rinse and repeat whole process)

Sigh...and that's why I love my mother, she's completely ingratiating in the most unassuming way. And now, it's time to go find my head where I left it. Have a great weekend, ya'll!